Storyteller of mud and grass

This is about most of us. Not all of us. Some are rare. Hobbies. What are hobbies simply? Hobbies are what we are when we are nothing else but just ourselves. The world order has programmed us to be a relative entity. Since the beginning of memories, we are students of some school, then of some subject, then of some institution. We move further thinking of creating our own identity, ironically thats when we enter the darkest part of our cerebral slavery, we become employees, mostly of solitude and slaves of depicted ironies.  To make it very simple, when we do not have a job or are not enrolled to any college, how do we introduce ourselves to others? We generally are short of words.  I have realised, these phases of joblessness and drop years, define us the best. During these phases people come up with what they actually are.  Hobbies are what we are when we are nothing else but  just ourselves. This is what makes an individual di...

I wonder how my town was before i was born I wonder how does is feel now to touch  Does the rays of sunlight turn and hide beneath the fallen dry leaves The window parts its lips to gulp the evening sun Is the red notebook lying there under the brick My shoes my bicycle and my poems buried in peace under a sheet of aspiration  Aspiration which brought me here where i am Where i aspire again to be at the roots of what i was The moment of love that smells like eternity is not all The truth is that the moment will pass in a moment Life is what you live lifelong after that moment Somebody sends pictures of a native town I recognize it i recognize that i dont live in me anymore 24th March 2018

When ever i am tired of the mile long walk, I go back to the old shady tree A silent sleep in the tree's being, a dreamy starry sky The miles my despair walks away, closer to the start it draws I had planted it in the begining of time, the tree that never was I grew up looking at it growing and outgrowing the earthen vaas I returned to childhood everytime, everytime it left For times when change would fail to enlighten and failure would loose its cause I had planted it in the begining of time, the tree that never was Arpita April 2014 Saltlake

Doobte sooraj mein sooraj hone ka gumaan hoon main Kisi kati patang ki girti udaan hoon main Main kaun hoon agar tumhara hissa na hoon to Tumhare hi ek beete waqt ka kiya ehsaan hoon main Kaheen ko jate jate bhoola hua ek maqsad hoon Bhatke raaston ka bhoola jahaan hoon main Mujhe manzilon ka wasta de kar koi wapas na bula saka Suljhon ki duniya mein uljhan ki pehchaan hoon main Main kaun hoon agar tumhara hissa na hoon to Tumhare hi ek beete waqt ka kiya ehsaan hoon main Summer, 2013,

Ye jhoothi baaton ka bazar hai dost Wajah hi paison ki tarah bewajah hai Tum bhookh bech kar chhat khareedoge Main saansein bechkar hawa khareedunga Tum khwab bechkar dawa khareedoge Main kitab bechkar nasha khareedunga Koi wajah nahi hoti wafa ki talash mein bewafa ban jane ki Aqsar gande kapdon se hi safai ki jati hai Wajahat ki kamee nahi hoti Log ameer hote jate hain Is bazar me ghoomne se bohot pehle Jab tum aur main sirf kanche ka sauda karte the Kahaniyan sunakar dost banate the Us waqt ka khayal hi tha Jo maine kal raat bech diya Bhookh lagi thi Aur ye jhoothi baaton ka bazar hai dost Wajah hi paison ki tarah bewajah hai 26-Nov 2017

When habit and predictability withdrew from me Prejudice failed An unseen bug had bit my veins Remorse yet awaited Did not arrive I drank whatever was poured  I sailed and never went back When habit and predictability withdrew from me Prejudice failed the patrons Ate color and drank the sky I failed and failed and failed again Fear yet awaited did not arrive Time had bitten like an unseen bug I sailed and sailed forever 17 July 2017

It takes a lot of realization to realize that I'm not well. I've always hated being not well. Its almost synonymous to accepting deafeat. Yes, I'm defeated. I'm not well and for the last two years or so I've consistently shown the symptoms of a patient of major depression. Disinterest being one of the most prominent symptoms, it took me two years to gather interest to check it on google. In an alloy of surprise and shock, i came to find that i was a patient.  Depression can be vaguely perceived as a distant second cousin of comma. I hear, i see, i taste, i feel but nothing sinks in. The unwillingness and disinterest is the sharpest edge. It will cut you into pieces of disintegrated cognizance, yet your visible self would remain intact. You will find all known things around including little thibgs that used to make you happy. They would no longer interest you.  However, my feeling of being a body into comma was validated by google. Several other points had a shock...

Mujhe nahi pata mera bhoot kya hai Kaun mere poorwajon ke bhaaiyon ke bachche hain Kaanse ke bartan the ya fasal ki kyari thi Mujhe nahi pata meri nasle kitni sari thi Kitni vidya apni hai kitna fann udhaar ka Aaj ka mere ghar ka pata kitna hai hathyaar ka Jalaata raha dafnaata raha main martaa hi raha Kaise bhi jeeyun main maut se darta hi raha Mujhe nahi pata mere dushmano ke kya naam the Teen sau saal ki yaaddasht, nau sau saal ki bardaasht thi Ya paanch hazaar saal se hum khud hi ke gulaam the Mujhe nahi pata mere dushmano ke kya naam the Wo kaun the jinhone hamare mandir tod diye 4Aur wo kaun the jo hamare mandiro me humein hi ghusne nahi dete the Mujhe nahi pata mere dushmano ke kya naam the Avtaaron ke bhagwaano ke paigambaron ke kya paigaam the Mujhe maaloom hai main aaj bhi khwaishon ka ek pyada hoon Thoda sach thoda aantrik thoda muqammal thoda adha hoon Kal bhi loriyon ko sach maanker jane kitno ko mujrim banaye hai Maine samay ki shuruaat se khud ko sapne hi dik...

I was looking for you in the words of a poem I was looking for you in stars Your presence and absence co exist Like time, you are abundant and scarce If facing the sun means being a day I would follow you across death When you look at me like a stranger does The sun sets deep in my breath Like an ocean can’t help the thirsty And the stars can’t light the sky The feel of your absence is so pertinent Even your being there can’t be lie I was looking for you in my lost smiles I was looking for you in pain The meaning...

What is a comfort zone. The past, the present or that hypothetical aspiration which we call future. Or a situation where all of these coexist. Our minds and bodies are weirdly programmed. All of us are both resistant yet equally adaptable to change. The mind belongs to all those names, places, animals and things which we have come across in the past few months or years. A person who has been through a tyrant dynamic changing surroundings in the recent memory would always tend to trust uncertainty more than anything. Ironically the same person would have assumed himself to be the most stable while being into an unchanged world at some point in time. The mind actually belongs to nothing. It always tends to belong. It is still always a zone and never the world, it shall always have huge room to relocate.  16th Dec 2016

A small towner with aerodynamic dreams achieve a lot of dreams. The biggest thing they achieve is the realization of the human ability to be like water. They shape up into the shape of the cities they settle down in one after the other. The systems they fall in one after the other. Like the human ability to swim and cycle, every human is born with this as well. They don't realize it until they are made to do so. At every step they find a new planet. Yet they inhabit it like they always were from there. The metal dreams alone are the drivers of this strength of being water. Once a person realizes this ability, they exercise it time and again. They keep on crossing milestones one after the other. Milestones, the ones visible to the world and the once visible only to the self. Sometimes though, a habit, a change of habit or a pretention of it - are all milestones. A person identifies oneself with the identity of a big city for years on - only to hide the identity crisis deep wit...